My life seems to be going down the tubes as of late. If you have missed the depressing post train over the past two weeks, this post is hopefully the caboose. No, no one is dead. I am not in therapy. I don’t have some disfiguring medical condition but, my life isn’t very ideal at the moment and honestly, it kind of sucks.
My hesitancy for writing about this is that it goes against my usual “keep it upbeat” blogging rule. Everyone has problems. My situation could certainly be worse and, I know better than to think that the internet cares whether or not the world seems to want to use me as its personal punching bag.
When I write this blog, I like to talk about happy things or ways to see problems in the light instead of the dark. I like to show the world the chipper side of me because honestly, no one wants to read about someone who lives their life thinking the glass is half full.
But, my life is not perfect.
It’s easy to read this blog and think, oh, her life is good. She studied in England. She rock climbs. She’s in college. She has money to spend on makeup. And I do live a good life, but my world is just as flawed as yours. I fail. I trip. I spill stuff on my clothes. I am not a curly haired cyborg who sits behind a computer and spends her life obsessing over which eye shadow to wear next.
And I am writing this because I feel that the blogging community as a whole has made a rule that it’s not okay to be negative – at all. Bloggers are expected to be these flawless human beings who pretend that their world is brimming with positivity 24/7 when I am willing to argue that some of us are just trying to keep it all together.
I try really hard in life. I am a hard worker and a good friend. I am loyal and smart but, I am not perfect. My life is not perfect. If you read this blog and think that my life is fields of sunshine and daisies, you’ve got it wrong. Some days I just want to curl up and never leave my bed, but I keep going. Isn’t that what all of us do? And if you can say that you never feel the urge to just say – screw this – than please fill me in on your secret.
My point is that – I am not perfect. Despite how much eye shadow I own or how much money I can spend on clothes – I have as many problems as the next person. Bloggers are humans, not robots. Just because someone is posting about drinking smoothies, traveling across the country, or waking up at 5 a.m. to do yoga does not mean that their life is somehow devoid of the problems that each of us face.
It’s easy to project what we think about someone without finding out the real story. How many times has a friend approached you with a problem and, you find yourself wondering how you never noticed that anything was wrong? It’s harder to deal with reality than relying on constructions that we form for other people with or without their consent.
I urge you to consider the masks that people wear in life and the internet. I urge you to think hard about the “perfect” people in your life and ask yourself if you are really, honestly, looking. I urge you to take each blog with a grain of salt, to avoid comparing yourself to a perfect construction that has come to represent only a small portion of someone’s reality. But most importantly, I urge you to be kind to yourself.
This life is short and, there are a lot of hills to climb. Every person on this planet has problems so before you bury what you are feeling, consider talking to one of the other millions of people on this planet – one of whom has probably walked a similar path. You will never know the truth about someone unless you ask to them.
You might be surprised what you find.